It would be absurd for me to ask if you’ve ever been hurt by others, so I won’t. But what I will ask is, how much of a wall did that hurt cause you to put up? Who have you pushed away because of the pain caused by someone else? And most importantly, how long will you continue to bleed on others?
Putting up walls, holding grudges, and bleeding on everybody who had NOTHING to do with my pain has been my specialty! I know, not cool! The sad thing is, I really didn’t realize where all my pain was coming from until I hit about 35! I had so many years of pent up hurt and had kept it tucked away in my own little side pouch of my heart, that I never realized how important it was to talk about it–so I didn’t! Instead, I carried it around and I bled on anybody that dared get close to me! Their intentions (good or bad) didn’t matter! If I was going to be in (emotional) pain, so were they! The worst part about this story is my husband most definitely has been the one on the receiving end and has endured more wounds than he really signed up for!
For many years my husband tried to stop me from bleeding, but nothing worked. It was almost as if the more he tried to love me, the more I would spew out disdain, because afterall “how dare he care about me!” And bless his heart, he truly had no idea what level of crazy I was–and to be honest, I didn’t either–until it was almost too late! What I do know now is, I continued to bleed on him because I kept pulling off the band-aid! I refused to let my hurt heal! It was like I was addicted to the hurt and the pain, and no amount of his love was going to fix me! So I did the only thing I knew to do–I kept picking the scab! Ya know, the scab keeps all of the dirt out and heals your wounds while keeping it covered! Well, I kept pulling the scab off and bleeding on the one person who was trying to help me–my husband!
So who are you bleeding on? Who is trying to help you heal, but you refuse to let them put the band-aid on? Who is doing everything they can to protect your wound, but you continue to pull off the scab and stain their heart? Who is that ONE person that is trying their best to put your pieces back together by using a tourniquet, but you have refused to let them secure it?
Right now would be a really good time to realize that help is being offered, before it’s too late! I came really close to bleeding out, because of stubbornness! ** How lonely that would’ve been** Looking back, I can see where I left blood stains on my journey! But I can also see where there are patches of dry spots from when the blood had been stopped–although, that was ALWAYS temporary, and those dry spots are few and far between!
So I’m pleading with you–stop bleeding on those who didn’t cut you! Stop allowing your blood to stain the hearts of the ones who love you the most! Let others use all the band-aids, cloths, and tourniquets they have and just rest in peace knowing that it really will be okay! Be rest assured that your heart CAN mend, but it is a choice! Choose healing! Choose love! Choose peace! Choose to be an overcome and choose to NOT bleed on others!
Enjoy Every Moment 